Format: Advance
Genre: Racing
Developer: The Code Monkeys
Publisher: Crave

CRAVE ENTERTAINMENT at it's finest... Alright, Where to begin with this. For starters, there's no credits. Always a good sign right? I couldn't find any credits anywhere in this game. Apparently the people that made this were so ashamed of their creation that not a single one of them wanted to leave their name on it. Rightfully so. This game is hot garbage. There are like 6 or 7 "X" games on the GBA, and the first one I've played here was absolute garbage. Let's start off with the negatives. The graphics are pretty bad overall, and the music is a bit too repetitive. The gameplay is that of a racing game, think snowboard kids. There are 4 races, you and 3 others chosen at random. Here's the kicker, some of the randos simply cannot be beaten. They are like, max stats or something, I don't know, they have beyond rubberbanding speed. I saw the cowboy girl in the white hat wreck, go to 4th, 3 seconds later come all the way back to first, pass me, do a couple of swirls in front of me, wreck again, then pass me again and leave me in the dust. The gameplay is a racing game on a flat board. Think Super Mario Kart but with only 4 races like snowboard kids. Now here's the "fun" part... there are 3 powerups in this game. Red Shoes will let you get a nitro-like speed burst by pressing the L button. The medkit fills up the bar in the top left. The hamburger... is a hamburger. You may be thinking "oh wow this game has health, that's why it's hard" no. No. Just no. Health does nothing. You don't lose health when you wreck. I don't know why they made a Health meter. I don't know what he hamburgers do. I don't know why the enemy skaters can glide through objects and suddenly crash for no reason in a wide open space. I don't know why there's no selection glow on things you're selecting. I don't know why this game causes you to lose all speed on every collision, I don't know why you only get 10-20 cash for winning 2nd or 1st, I don't know why after you get an upgrade it doesn't tell you you've gotten an upgrade, I don't know why it allows you to buy a weaker upgrade after you've gotten a better upgrade. I don't know what the hell the hamburger does!??!! Why is it a hamburger? WHY ARE THERE HAMBURGERS ON THE SKATING RACE ARENA!?!? Among the questions I have for this game, The "upgrades" are the most mysterious. There's 3 upgrades you can buy: Wheels - Health - Skates. Wheels seems obvious, I think... Health is probably the most obvious, since health does nothing anyways. Skates was the most strange... the higher level stuff had LESS weirdly shaped gray things on it. The wheels had thunderbolt symbols btw, I assumed it was power? or speed? In all honesty, beating this game is mostly luck. How does one beat this game anyways? There are no credits, well.. in this case, I just went with the good old fashion: "Unlock all levels and beat the final level" route. To unlock levels in Tour Mode(The other 2 modes were time trial and practice) you have to beat the previous level at 2nd or 1st place. There are 10 levels overall. Some are better than others. The AI is relentless in all of them. It's often better to just restart and hope for a better group of enemies if you get a super speeder up front. Some of the things I need to mention are that the design of where the powerups are placed is often sadistic too. Think corners. You NEED to get some of those powerups to even win. The hitboxes along with the jumping in this game also have the most ridiculous timers. I swear minimal effort was put into this game. I think I gave this review more effort than the dev team did making this garbage pile. Probably a bunch of fatasses too busy eating HAMBURGERS!?!?!

All in All, I had pity on this by granting it a 2.5 instead of a 2. It'd be easier to read the review for my list of grievances for this game but I'll try to sum it up: No Credits, Bad Handling, Nonsense Mechanics, Unwinnable scenarios, Bad Hitboxes, Bad Menu Utility, Bad In-Game Identifications/Notifications, Bad Graphics, Bad AI, Bad Game.